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Small Cabin Forum / General Forum / Am I the Only woman who wants to live at the cabn full time? Hubby thinks im crazy........
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naturelover66
Member
# Posted: 21 Feb 2011 10:42am
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Heres the deal...... and i would appreciate other viewpoints.
Am i crazy thinking about moving to our newly purchased cabin full time ?? I would find a job first......... our cost of living would be much lower....... and i would be so happy to finally live in nature. Away from the crime, congestion, nosey neighbors and basic misery of the city.
We live in a Suburb of Detroit.......... i was born and raised in Detroit..... Our kids are grown..... the cabin is only 3 1/2 hours from Detroit.....so we can visit....... Its not timbucktoo....... for gods sakes.
My husband who has worked in Manufacturing for almost 28 years has lost four jobs in ten years here.......... Im sure you have all heard Michigan has been struggling for a while now. The unemployment rate In Detroit is 25 percent. Hubby is currently unemployed....... we spend every dime i earn on our bills......... almost nothing left over for an emergency fund or anything that may come up.
Now we are plagued with a huge stack of medical bills from an emergency open heart surgery i had two years ago. The cabin is only 20 minutes from a hospital and near a cute town with everything we would need.
I have always wanted to live in the country......... Our bills would be a lot lower..... and we would have peace and solitude. How can this be bad or crazy ?? We can always move back right ??
Ive been looking for and applying for jobs.......... i work in vet medicine..... im sure i will find something.
After a heart attack, cardiac death and open heart surgery....... life looks different. How do i make the hubby understand this ? He says he understands......... and hes a wonderful man..... my near death experience only brought us closer after 23 years of marriage.
I just think its odd that most women want the shopping malls and beauty salons at their back door...... most men want to run away to nature for peace and relaxation. Its the opposite in my house.
Maybe i have " The grass is greener Syndrome" ........ who knows.
I just want a better quality of life. Cabin quality.
Naturelover66

cabingal3
Member
# Posted: 21 Feb 2011 11:40am
Reply 


nope u are not the only gal.i am one too.i would move out there this minute...but theres bills to pay still.the time is not right yet.we have sold everything in the past and stayed out in the wilderness two weeks and moved back.hubby at the time was driving so many miles to and from work it was crazy .I am convinced we may of had an easier time keeping our at the time teengirl contained but she eventually would of acted out around there.soo just sitting tight-trying to scrimp and not buy anything un-needed.enjoy the times we do go out there and just take a run in our car with the grandkids to walk by the river and see and be with nature,or sit on my back porch and look at the birds flitting about from tree to tree.the men are not gonna do it till they feel it is smart and safe to do it.no one can budge them...some wont actually ever cause of the comfort zone issues like not being able to flick on the thermostat to get warm easilyi hear you-naturelover 66.up where we are at -there is not jobs.there is no major chain grocery stores or any stores worth a hoot.so we would be paying 6$ for a jar of apple jelly that in our city right now i would pay 1.99$ for.so its ok with me as i want to plant our fruit trees out there now even but we can not.the deer would eat them and they need water and we still need our well hand pump on so we can water but we are not out there long enough to water and watch over our fruit trees.it would take up being out there full time to watch over them.so i just try to enjoy every second of the time i have out there.and dont ask for more cause wanting more,in my case makes me want to pack up my car and head to the woods ...i try not to ask for more in my case but to enjoy the time out there.i still have to paint the one cabin floor we built,we still have to put more paneling in on the walls.we want to start a bigger place next.so it will all take time.we had building fund monies we had to give to our 30 yr old girl to get her moved into her own place cause we were going nuts.so now we are really gonna be looking at craigs list to build a bigger place.i know in our case it is our bills that are holding us back.i too think i will die before i get to live out there ...so be it.i still get to go out there and enjoy it even if i would love to go more.hubby said we are spending a week out there this summer.i can not imagen how wonderful it will be.i also want him to be free of working for several seasons of his life...so he can experience how it is to get up and not go to work,to just putter about,to have a project he can work on all day.also i do not work so i feel so grateful to him he s letting me stay home and tend my grandsons...by the way gal,i love Michigan.i lived up at Kinceloe air force base when i was a girl for 5 yrs.i loved it up there.cabingal3

naturelover66
Member
# Posted: 21 Feb 2011 11:59am
Reply 


Thank you....... you make some very good points. I guess i am just being impatient. Yep, Michigan is beautiful...... well, the northern part anyway. Im only 44..... hopefully the ticker will hold out a while.
I hope you get to spend alot of time at your cabin in paradise this spring/ summer.
As soon as possible...... i will post pics of mine.
Have a wonderful day. Im heading out to play with my two labs in the ten inches of fresh snow we just got last night. Woo Hoo !!!
Naturelover66
February 21 2011   New Snow !!!
February 21 2011 New Snow !!!


hattie
Member
# Posted: 21 Feb 2011 01:37pm
Reply 


I don't think you're crazy. I was the one who fell in love with our cabin first. It was a dump, complete with bullet hole in the front window and graffitti on all the walls. I told Hubby I could see us retiring here one day and he just laughed at me. After we spent a few years coming up here every weekend, Hubby got hooked too. We moved up here full time in 2007 and I have never regretted one day.

Our cabin isn't in the "wilderness" but it is in a small, semi-remote town that has no stores or amenities. We are about 20 minutes to a slightly larger town that does have a grocery store, hardware store and Sears outlet. *S*

We did some renovations to our cabin to make it more realistic to live in full time (ie we put in a laundry room and clothes closets - oh and a stove *S*, plus a greenhouse). Then we built a small 3 unit motel along the same theme as our cabin (which was built in 1912). The income we get from our motel gives us some money towards the bills (when you live this lifestyle, you really don't need much money) and it gives us a chance to meet lots of really nice people.

We semi-retired when I was 46 years old. I had a stressful job in the city before that and hated every day I worked. My Dad died suddenly of a heart attack and that was when Hubby and I decided life was too short and you just never know what tomorrow will bring. Now I have no stress and get to pursue hobbies like writing and cooking. My dream was to one day write a book and now I have written and published two!

Hubby is enjoying his hobbies of air guns and hunting and we both garden and can and preserve fruit. On quiet days Hubby and I head out on our rhino (quad) to go exploring in the mountains behind us and I couldn't tell you how many times we say to each other, "no one should be allowed to have this much fun." *S*

I say, if there is any possible way you can achieve your dream - GO FOR IT! Life is just too short to keep putting it off.

naturelover66
Member
# Posted: 21 Feb 2011 02:44pm
Reply 


See !!! You get it !!! Thank you ........ this is what i wanted to hear/ read...... I kept thinking i was just being selfish...... wanting and needing something that was unrealisitic. Its not crazy at all......
I think its very possible to achieve my dream...... and yeah, life is way to short..... and unpredicatable.
Naturelover66

SmlTxCabin
Member
# Posted: 21 Feb 2011 06:44pm
Reply 


I am a 28 year old female who realized that a 100k house in the burbs was not for me. I felt like I would be mortgaging my future. So I have chosen to build a small modest cabin about 30 miles away from the small town in which I work. It has always always been my dream to live in a cabin and when I was looking at purchasing a home and the thought of a 30 year commitment was hanging over my head, I decided that it would be much more smart to build a small efficient cabin that I can pay for as I build and not have to pay off later. I found a piece of property purchased it and started my small cabin last May. I am finishing up the bathroom and the kitchen, lay my floors, connect my water and I will be living in my small cabin full time by summer. This has always been my dream, but it was not until a few years ago that I realized my dream could easily become my reality with the right planning and patience. With a sharp eye and adventurous spirit I have been able to find some incredible deals that have enabled me to get my cabin finished quickly. And when I am done. I will have no mortgage, and very very low utility bills. I will also have the ability to grow some of my own food, and have animals that could help me sustain myself if something were to fold the infrastructure of our precarious society. SO long story short, NO I do not think you are crazy.

squirrel
Member
# Posted: 21 Feb 2011 07:06pm
Reply 


I am right there with you If I could I'd live there all the time but the husband likes his tv and the comforts of turning on the lights Me give me a book the outdoors and a creek I am good nothing wrong with taking a cold bath and cooking on a grill if i have to. i love the outdoors alot better the the inside. I'm working on getting things a little more efficient may not be the greatest way but hey if it works and I get to go then its worth it. Iam very fortunate to live close to the place I crave to be its only 30 minutes and I get to go when ever I can to work. I have worked to make my yard into a pardise of it own But there is still no place like the mountains where the water runs the birds chirp bears and deers roam and you can do absolutely nothing if you want and feel like its ok.
hopefully one day I will get to spend alot of time there and it gives me something to look forward to.

MikeOnBike
Member
# Posted: 21 Feb 2011 07:27pm
Reply 


My wife is ready to move up for the season as soon as we get our shed built this spring. We have been tent camping for the last couple of years and she has been tempted to stay during the week while I go back to work but was worried about nasty weather and the mtn. lion.

The shed will be insulated and have a little electricity for music and lights. That's enough for her. She prefers to cook with her dutch ovens anyway.

Gary O
Member
# Posted: 21 Feb 2011 09:49pm
Reply 


Quoting: cabingal3
also want him to be free of working for several seasons of his life...

Yeah, maybe today's men are a bit slow of foot when it comes to cashing in and actually moving to the cabin.
I can't speak for every husband, so I'll just put in my two bits (which is pretty much my life savings).
I mean there's some hearty menfolk who are doing it, and quite well. They are to be saluted.
My position is this;
My investments cash in in three years, of which social security (whatever's left) will also kick in.
So I am biding my time, paying things down, and practicing frugality without discomfort.
Cabi3 is low maintenance, always has been, bless her heart, and yet still turns my head after all these years.
She'd move there in a heartbeat, but after years of toil, I'm not quite ready to create a load of discomfort just yet (read larryh's comment in Concept of "Cabin/Camp/Shed/Shack").
Hypocritical?
Some, maybe.
It's moot.
Once a certain age, there's not a lot to fall back on to recover. I do harbor the thought of a safety net, whether a fallacy or not in this fragile economy.
However, I do take comfort in the fact that if I keeled over tomorrow, she'd cash out and live our dream, and I'd have had a part in it.
I can see it now;

Great grandkids visiting for the summer.

"See boys, your great grandpappy built that little cabin over yonder, and would've finished this'n if we'd'v moved out here sooner."
"Now put more wood in the stove, gonna be cold agin tonight"
"But Nammaw, that's a 55 gallon barrel."
"It cooked yer dinner didnit?"
"Now finish up them squirrel anuses, or yer gittn no pine needle pie."

My hope is to surprise her one day.........g'night folks, Jeopardy is on in 10 minutes.

Anonymous
# Posted: 22 Feb 2011 08:26am
Reply 


Hello naturelover66,

I think if you get the opportunity to move to your cabin, you should go for it. I am a bit older than you with grown children and an eleven year old daughter. My eleven year-old and I are making plans to move into a shed (or RV) on our land in Georgia, in the middle or nowhere. I am a bit nervous because I am a city girl from the north but I feel that that I am being drawn to the country (or woodsy wilds) for a reason. We have been storing some of the things that we think we will need to live off-grid and we are now in the process of looking for our pre-fab shed or older RV. I wish you much success in your quest to live in your cabin.

Anonymous
# Posted: 22 Feb 2011 08:26am
Reply 


P.S. The Anonymous post above is from Georgiamom.

cabingal3
Member
# Posted: 22 Feb 2011 10:52am
Reply 


dearest naturelover66.oh i get it but i have to go with my mate.
i get it.i have learned to pace myself.Otherwise i would be out there right this very minute.I love my woods and and the cabin we built together.But its no good with out my fella there.so i read books,watch fun woods tv shows and crochet to wait.i am getting pretty old and i dont actually ever think i will make it to ever actually live out in my woods.i think it will be a cabin in the sky.
too maybe your hubby is a bit scared cause of your health issues.i know we have no doctors out at our woods nor the towns close by-its life flight-if u can get drug to the main road.so i am just waiting for our time.good luck to u gal.i sure do understand.i have dreamt of this all my life.hugs rae

naturelover66
Member
# Posted: 22 Feb 2011 11:50am
Reply 


Cabingal3--- its making me so sad to see you write that you wont be able to live your dream and retire to your cabin........ I mean, i dont know how old you are but you have to think positive !!!! I have next door neighbors who have been married 30 years now..... they are in their mid sixties....... real go getters. The gentlemen is retiring in two years..... the mrs had a mild heart attack two years ago.... retired last year. They have always been nature type people...... they go kayaking in the lakes up here...... even the great lakes, they hike...... and have always dreamed of selling everything at retirement and buying a big huge sail boat........ boating around the country......and eventually the world. After her Heart Attack they took boating lessons..... priced the boats........ and actually bought one this fall !!!! Most people have their savings if they are lucky...... and pensions...again, very lucky and just travel or whatever . Ive learned the hard way serious health issues change everything. You have to do it when you can...... not wait.
Our little 5 acre property has a town a half hour away...... decent hospital. We are rural, but not remote i guess.
I know you get it........ ive read the passion of your dream here....... and I really hope you are wrong........ you should be able to live where you want after raising your kids and being a loving devoted wife for 42 years. You deserve it damnit. Strive for it.... whatever it takes and make it happen. You deserve more than a cabin in the sky.
By the way, I had a long talk with my wondeful husband last night..... we both spoke from the heart so to speak....... he agreed that we would work real hard this spring/summer....... fix the cabin up and as long as we can survive financially up there.... we will move up there in October 2011. I fell asleep with a sense of peace and hope last night i havent felt in forever. He told me he wants me to be happy...... really happy. So, today i will be researching the best ways to make use of our little piece of land and which food crops will flourish best.
Hugs right back at ya........
Lisa AKA Naturelover66

naturelover66
Member
# Posted: 22 Feb 2011 12:03pm
Reply 


GeorgiaMom-- Thank you for your good wishes ......... I do appreciate the kind words.
Ive driven thru Georgia........ beautiful........ Love those Magnolias you have down there.
I understand the woodsy wilds thing...... Good luck in finding your new home....... im sure you and your little girl will be very happy there.
Naturelover66

Erins#1Mom
# Posted: 22 Feb 2011 07:29pm
Reply 


I'm from the mountains of Northeast TN. I grew up in the mountains 1/4 mile off the main road on a one lane dirt road. I'm what you call a hillbilly. I fell in love with a city boy... He refused to move to the country. Lived in an apartment for a year. Then found two acres on the outskirts of town. HAPPY, HAPPY. Sadly, he talked me into moving into town..... City schools for our daughter, close to work, etc, etc..... It all made sense. But I can say, I have not been happy a day since (17 years).
I can honestly say that I would move back to the country in a heartbeat. Not even a second thought. My mom has offered to let me build a cabin on property she owns. I just need funding: 21 year old daughter and drug rehab have taken all my resources. I have a friend who says he thinks he can frame me in a small place for a couple thousand. That will leave septic and water. I could do outhouse for a little while. But that's how I grew up, didn't like it then and know I wouldn't now. I'm 53 and remember getting indoor bathroom.
Didn't mean to carry on.... But yes, I would move to cabin FULL TIME!

turkeyhunter
Member
# Posted: 22 Feb 2011 08:01pm
Reply 


Georgiamom.....wish i knew you needed a RV,,,,,,,,,,,,,just sold a 33 ft coachman camper/rv...........sink, .stove , fridge, ac, heat etc for 1000 bucks, did not need it, it was nice had hardwood floors etc ( i bought a 2007 pop-up camper) ,,,,,,( BTW georgia here also).....what part of georgia is your property????

larry
Member
# Posted: 22 Feb 2011 08:36pm
Reply 


my situation started out with 43 acres and only a tent. after a few years i found a working RV in tawas and drove it to my land. my friends and i used it as shelter during hunting season and the mice used it the rest of the time. fast forward 22 years a wonderful wife and 2 girls, 7&8. my kids wanted to go hunting with me but mommy,who is not the outdoor type said, "you are not putting my kids in the mouse house." so two summers ago i built a prefab cabin and the Mrs. gladly decorated the interior. it only took 1 seasons with the family at the cabin and now she is hooked . she has already made plans to go to the cabin during Easter while the kids are on break for the week I'll stay at home and work visiting on the weekends. some how i feel like i got hosed but i know she is finally addicted to the outdoors and our cabin. this summer's gonna be fun! i guess if i could find a way to live there i would.

naturelover66
Member
# Posted: 22 Feb 2011 09:38pm
Reply 


larry--- I love Tawas......... so beautiful there....the family and i have often visited and spent time on Lake Huron.
Glad your family loves the cabin........ it sounds wonderful !!!
Naturelover66

elkdiebymybow
Member
# Posted: 26 Feb 2011 10:05pm
Reply 


I think my wife would be into living at our place full time. Electricity and running water and oh, a bathroom would be a nice first. We still need to make a living unfortunately so for the forseeable future we will continue to build our businesses and work to balance our work life and play. We try to get up there more often each year and hopefully can retire one day and never have to make the drive from the mountains back to the valley again!

Barrys Bay
Member
# Posted: 2 Mar 2011 12:27am
Reply 


We have what they call "cabin fever". I get it from snowfall to March every year, so for about 5 months, groan. These days I wonder if it is more about who you were born to be and what you were born to do, than what society and the system expects you to be. There is only one life...this one. Fever is just a symptom of an underlying condition.

hattie
Member
# Posted: 2 Mar 2011 01:15am
Reply 


We used to get "cabin fever" - really bad "cabin fever" and had to deal with it every winter for about 4 years. When we pulled the plug and decided to move up here full time our family and friends thought we were nuts (and we were/are *S*). But at least now we are happy nuts.

I was never happy working for other people and living in a city. I love working for myself and making do with what we have. It just feels like the right way to live for me and Hubby. I don't like the government and I don't like to rely on other people to get things done. I don't like waste and pencil pushers who spend their days in meetings and doing studies. I'm not saying those things don't have their place; but they don't belong my my space. *S*

People ask me all the time, "don't you get lonely and bored?" I think I could easily become a recluse and not have a problem with that. *S* The winters are pretty quiet here, but I actually enjoy that. When we get busy in the summer and fall with tourists that gives me my people fix for the year. *grin*

I guess I've always been a "little different" but if we were all the same, life would be pretty boring wouldn't it?

toyota_mdt_tech
Member
# Posted: 5 Mar 2011 08:35pm
Reply 


Do you have a sister? LOL Ok, I'm married and I asked the wife would she ever want to relocate or live in the woods/country, she said "I'd go where ever you want to go" an that really made me feel good. I'm making good money now, I have 10-12 yrs max and I'm going to start building my home on my cabin acreage in about 8 yrs (no more than 800 sq feet, cheap living, cheap heating, cheap cooling, but will have a detatched large shop) . When the time comes I'm gone.


As for the original poster, you have good enough reasons to head out now!

neb
Member
# Posted: 5 Mar 2011 09:56pm - Edited by: neb
Reply 


My wife and I must be the odd couple. My wife has not even been to the land we bought. I ask her about buying some land and she was not against it but like I know she is not an outdoor person. She gave me the ok and I bought it. I have owned the land for over 1 year and she has not been there yet and she wouldn't even know how to get there. I will take her there someday but like I said she isn't an outdoor person. I have the best wife in the world. She knows my love for the great outdoors and supports me and lets me hunt, hike and fish all I want. In 28 years togather she has never said that I can't go hunting etc. I spend 100's of hours away from homeeach year. We have the best marriage a man could want. My wife would never live in the country if it was the last place to live on earth. She has her things and I have mine and works well for us.

bobrok
Member
# Posted: 5 Mar 2011 11:30pm
Reply 


Quoting: neb
the odd couple


neb,

That's not so odd. I bought our place w/o my wife seeing it, either. She knew I was looking seriously for a place and when this came available I was there in a hearbeat to scope it out, without her. She is an outdoors person, but not a living-in-the-woods-away-from-civilization type. She would prefer a cottage on the lake alongside 50 or 100 other cottages on the same lake. I wanted a remote setting with no neighbors. She has taken very well to our place and actually talks about it more than I do. She is an extreme type-A personality and I am very much a type-B. I've found that with a little nurturing she has begun to settle in to my low key version of life, at least when we are at the cabin. I am amazed.

Personally I think it will help her live longer, too! :-)

neb
Member
# Posted: 6 Mar 2011 09:48am
Reply 


bobrok, I enjoyed the read on the comparison of your wife and you that is interesting. It sounds like she has a good time when she is there and that is good. My land is so remote and has rattle snakes, bugs, lions and who knows what out there my wife isn't in to that. We are talking the wild west here. The sage and grass in places are 3 to 4 feet high. My wife would not walk through there for anything. For me it is another day and doesn't bother me. This part of the country might scare off a good man. If it rains to hard you walk out or stay. If the cabin I build would have electric, water and some goodys she might consided going there but not with snakes. Rattlers for me is just another day. I have had many close encounters but all is good. They let you know when your to close so you learn to share.

naturelover66
Member
# Posted: 6 Mar 2011 11:25am
Reply 


Neb -- Where is your cabin AFRICA ?? I worry about the occasional black bear here in Northern Michigan...... but i dont mind snakes........ i work in vet medicine....... handled a few snakes in my day and honestly they are kinda cool.
My husband........... he worries about the critters more than i do . So, i laugh at him and tell him to buy a gun. A big one........ lol.

I would move up to the cabin tomorrow.......... enjoy the solitude and peace and quiet. I can leave the crime and traffic behind with out a care............ the neighbors i wouldnt miss a bit.

I believe it would help me to live longer..... now that ive already dodged the heart bullet..... who knows whats next right? Im young damnit....... i need some fun time.

As for my sister...... we are complete opposites...... in every way. I am tall and lean, she is short and stout........ i love the outdoors and animals....... she cant get a finger dirty . Im the odd one i guess. I hate shopping and dont need to buy a new purse every month.
Oh well.......... As long as i have my cabin im happy.
I keep telling the hubby i will live there and he can visit occasionally.......... he just rolls his eyes. MEN.
OH, you know how i was looking for a job near the cabin ?? I received 3 calls for interviews........... and when i discussed actually interviewing and moving this spring ?? The Husband said we are not ready. I can hardly look at him.
IM the one who needs the Scotch...... too bad im not a drinker.
Im a

Naturelover66

naturelover66
Member
# Posted: 6 Mar 2011 11:28am
Reply 


Barrys Bay---------- I couldnt agree more.

Naturelover66

bushbunkie
Member
# Posted: 6 Mar 2011 12:02pm
Reply 


Quoting: toyota_mdt_tech
Do you have a sister? LOL Ok, I'm married and I asked the wife would she ever want to relocate or live in the woods/country, she said "I'd go where ever you want to go" an that really made me feel good. I'm making good money now, I have 10-12 yrs max and I'm going to start building my home on my cabin acreage in about 8 yrs (no more than 800 sq feet, cheap living, cheap heating, cheap cooling, but will have a detatched large shop) . When the time comes I'm gone.



Hey Toyota! (wasn't that a commercial once???)

Anyway, Looks like I've got the same plan as you do...one exception...my wonderful wife doesn't know about it yet! HA!
I'm going to lay the groundwork nice and slow over the next few years...so she thinks it's her idea...and oh, will I be supportive!
Yup...none of the women out there should be surprised...all husbands are pretty well evil!

Barrys Bay
Member
# Posted: 6 Mar 2011 01:47pm
Reply 


It's so great to see couples who are trying really hard to compromise and let the other do what makes them happy. I would love to move to our cabin now and am considering going up for a month all by myself (with the dog of course). People thinks it's crazy, especially for a woman to do. They think an animal will hurt me...I'm more afraid of humans than bears!
Seriously though, I would be quite content to make an honest living and live a simple life up there. I feel so connected, so myself, and very comfortable in those surroundings. I have learned a lot about myself and have gained some building experience too. We are deifinitely an unusual breed of people, not everyone can do what we do!

naturelover66
Member
# Posted: 7 Mar 2011 08:56pm
Reply 


I would love to live at the Cabin...... use solar and a wood stove....... have a huge garden and maybe a few chickens ( for eggs). I cant kill a bug, a chicken is completely out of the question. Hubby jokes we would have the oldest cow in Michigan. Anyway, I would love fruit trees....... plan on planting a few this summer. A pond stocked with fish..... and a green house. Two paint horses trotting around the beautiful pasture and ofcourse our little wooden cabin..... porch chairs and one of those beautifully sounding wind chimes hanging from the porch roof.......and my two dogs. I would die happy with this scenario. Very happy. Or maybe........... i would live to be a hundred.
Okay...... well the one glass of wine is kickin in .......... i am off to watch some crap on tv. before i type something stupid. Just dreamin......
I will get the hubby up there........ or die tryin......
Naturelover66

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